Things to Do and Be

I was inspired by a particularly brave thirty-something whom I dearly love and deeply admire to write a list of things I want to do and be but am afraid to try or there are obstacles in the way that seem insurmountable.

  1. Grow and tend my own herbs and vegetables.  (We bought seeds yesterday!)
  2. Have a regular yoga/mediation practice.
  3. Leave the country for a family vacation.
  4. Take some of the incredible love my sweet Sunshine has brought us and reinvest it in our marriage in new ways that better fit who and where we are in life now.
  5. Learn to swing and ballroom dance.
  6. Ride Daisy (and not just in the paddock or round pen).
  7. Become an active member of this lovely town and community.
  8. Publish

There they are.  Eight things I badly want to do and be.

I am afraid I will fail.

Actually, I’m pretty confident I will fail.  And just as confident that I can dust off and try again.  I’ve failed before; I know the drill.  After all, nothing ventured, nothing gained, right?  : )

What are you afraid to try?  What do you want that, in this moment, seems impossible?  And what are you going to do about it?

IMG_1357

This Year

This year is for my writing.

He understands and gave me books to read and time alone for Christmas.

I’m not sure why now, I just know that my thirties feel complicated but without all the fire and fear of my twenties.  It’s as if I could write it all again, only thicker this time, with more satisfaction and less splattering.

I kicked jealousy out of my bed for hogging all the covers and my toes are finally warm.  My writing is much improved without the distraction of freezing toes.

This old house invites me to sit while she holds us all safe within and let my mind wander out past the field stone walls.  She seems to understand so well, I am clearly not the first writer to live here.

My daydreams are clearer, my fingers slower, my desire steadier, and my thoughts more complete than they have ever been.

This year is for my writing.